Yes I am starting this with the word clarity. I am too anxious right now. I don't know what to write and also want to write so much at the same time. I guess I should be sad or happy.. I don't know what the fuck I am even writing.. I don't give a fuck and don't know I have so much to say that I don't know from where to start and that's where I am stuck .. I wanted to do coding today and want to advanced in my carrier and had lot of dreams but It seems like nothing will go good and I am already lost in it. I really want to be successful and want to make money actually want to be able to get so much money. My success seems to be like I am guessing if it is or not I don't know. But it seems like I want to work on how I will be living. Really . I think I should asko this question to myself many more times. I really want to be able to understand my situation properly. And get an upper view. As currently I don't know what's happening.

So let's see I want to achieve so many things what I actually think about succes I just say with words so many things to achieve. But clearly do not know what I really want to achieve. So I think I need to get it right now by asking my self and taking time to think and relax.

What I really want to look like doing in next 10 years.

I think I should have a good car, a owned house, buy so much gold to mom, buy atleast 10 acers of land. And gift my dad a car. Thats it .. I guess I want to achieve this things right now... Here I don't have particular to me. I don't want so many things I realise after writing this. There are common and doable. But how how should I achieve it. I need to think . I think I should study hard get good grades and study hard and get good learning of Java and so many technologies and get a high paying job. And change my jobs regularly so that I could get even more pay. Thats how it's going to happen. I will buy stuff with the paycheck.

I don't have any Idea about marrage and I don't care at this moment atleast.

What I want to achieve in next five years and how .. I want a good job , a good girlfriend, yessss ofcourse I want, and travel so much so much I really love that yaaar. How will I achieve that. I can reach out to girls even more and yes that I am in a good progress. Fir good job I need to keep learning even if I got a job. Start traveling from now on to be able to get a habit. And also I want to have a good physique at this moment for that I really need to start to going to gym. I really want to be strong look strong and good.

In one year I want to be able to get a good job offer and being happy with it. For that to happen I really need to start coding for atleast 4 hours every day. Or even more. I really need to be able to showcase the best out of me.

In one month I really want to achieve this things and that are .. complete java course. Complete 2 java projects, get a habit of DSA regularly. Start open source. Learn JavaScript, learn react MERN MEAN and all.